In the Growing Humankindness community, a woman described a ‘ping’ – that feeling she gets when she feels something light up inside. Her whole being whispers, “Pay attention.”
Ah, yes! I imagine we all have those moments – those dawnings of resonance and recognition.
Sometimes the pings come as an insight of awareness. For me it feels like a door opening, a light shining on something I hadn’t seen before.
Sometimes it’s a feeling of being held when we feel swallowed by silence, darkness or loneliness.
Sometimes we read a line in a book, or we hear something in a movie or in a song, and the hair stands up at the back of our neck. That line or movie feels like it’s speaking directly to us.
No matter what form they take, in these moments, we remember that we’re not alone. Whew, it’s easy to forget.
On days when I feel at my wit’s end, or recovery feels like a whisper of a dream, I ask for help. I go outside and sing to our newborn plants – the squash coming into fruit, the green tomatoes, the baby peaches. I run my fingers through the lavender and bring her scent up to my nose.
I reach out to dear ones who accompany me – listening partners, support groups, loved ones, my therapist. I pray and ask for guidance. I think of Anne Lamott’s sincere plea – “I can use some operating instructions here!!”
I walk the dogs and look for the blue heron by the pond.
Afterwards, I might write a poem. I might make a batch of prayer flags. I might suddenly see a way that I’d hurt another in my own ignorance or suffering, and I reach out to apologize.
Humility and forgiveness are such beautiful ways to come home.
‘Others feel this, too’
In her work on self compassion, Kristin Neff reminds us that one component of self compassion is to remember that ‘others feel this, too.’ Whatever you may be experiencing or feeling, you’re not alone.
When we remember this, our troubles feel less personal and more opportunities to deepen, open and love more fully. We come back to our interconnectedness. Our suffering isn’t solitary, but shared.
I imagine you have your own rituals, the ways you remember this thread of connection. When your experiences with food, healing trauma, relationships, work, or recovery start to go sideways, I hope that this connection steadies you.
It also helps to surround ourselves with a soul tribe, with those that help us remember. If you’re wanting more support for your healing and you’d like to get more community support, I talk about the Growing Humankindness community below. We’re currently open for new members. If your heart says yes, we’d love to have you join us!
No matter what kind of support you seek, or what ballasts your heart in the ebbs and flows of life, poet William Stafford reminds us that our task is simple: to never let go of this thread.
May we all hold on.